Moms, grandmothers, and great-grandmothers never want to pass the torch on hosting family holiday dinners and get-togethers. Many insist on hosting even if they have adult children with bigger houses and their own families.
But if you have ever hosted guests, you understand how the necessary planning, shopping, cooking, and cleaning can be draining. For elderly loved ones, and elderly mothers in particular, hosting during the holidays gets harder and potentially more draining with each passing year.
How Do You Know if It's Time for Someone Else to Host?
Entertaining more than ten or twenty guests is not easy. It involves an incredible amount of planning, preparing, cooking, and after they leave, a complete house clean-up. Every year, the number of guests likely increases, and the capability of your elderly mom to handle it reduces.
Is it time for someone else to host? Here's what to watch out for.
Signs to Watch For
Some of the signs that the events of hosting family dinners and get-togethers for the holidays could be too much for your elderly mom to manage include:
- She developed chronic health problems
- She gets tired easily
- She is losing their eyesight
- She constantly feels cold
- She recently fell
- Her hygiene changes and she stops caring for herself
- Her health deteriorates
- She has difficulty managing daily tasks
Ask for the Opinions of Other Family Members
To confirm your thoughts, gauge if it's the right solution, and determine the best way to broach the topic of having someone else host, you should ask for the opinion of the other people it will affect—other family members. This will also allow you to decide who else has the ability to host, and discuss what to do if your elderly mom disagrees.
Speak to Your Mom
Ask your mom what they think about the idea, even if you've discussed the subject before. Explain your concerns and why you believe she should let someone else host the family. You might be surprised to learn she knew she couldn't manage it this time and was waiting for someone to ask.
If she agrees, explain how you plan on sharing the hosting responsibility. If she adamantly refuses, don't argue or keep pushing. She likely wants to keep hosting for several reasons, and you wouldn't want to divide the family.
Instead, offer her the alternative: maybe she hosts the holiday dinners at her home, but other family members bring the food. Or, if she insists on cooking, family members will pitch in in other ways: set the table, pack up leftovers, do the dishes, and clean the kitchen.
With simple compromises and reallocation of tasks, you, your family, and your elderly mom can still enjoy holiday get-togethers.
Consider In-Home Senior Care for Your Loved One
Family get-togethers should be a time of family fun and celebration; they shouldn't be a burden on anyone. If your elderly mom hosts the holidays, you should be on the lookout for signs that it may be too much for her to handle.
If you notice these signs or others, it could indicate that they need a caregiver for in-home care to enable them to facilitate independent living.
If your elderly mom resides in the Greater Knoxville area, Senior Helpers can provide non-medical in-home care. We provide caregiving services in Knoxville, Maryville, and Clinton.Our professional caregivers, personal care aides, certified nursing assistants, and home health aides can provide daily living assistance, companionship, and specialized care for those with chronic conditions.
Contact Senior Helpers of Knoxville to begin your parents' in-home care today.