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I think the lockdown has caused depression/mental illness in my 85 year old Mom. How do I get help for her?

My mother lives in Tempe Arizona, me and my husband visit her frequently but she has not socialized or seen friends in a year because of the virus. Her personality has changed dramatically, it's quite scary. I have noticed for the first time in her life she's very depressed and is a little forgetful, her self esteem is rock bottom. I'm not sure if she has dementia or Alzheimer's but this could be early symptoms, how do I get help for her or what type of doctor should see? Before the lockdown she always was happy and upbeat had high self esteem and didn't allow to be put down. No memory problems. I do know for that past year her brother who is 93 -my Uncle- calls her almost every day and they talk for about 4 hours. He is much better off than her, has much more money and lives in a better area, he will brag about that for hours and she tells him things like "wow you're the best, you're so lucky and perfect" also "wow your family is perfect and wonderful" but he will never say anything nice about her family, he then is always talking about dying and how he will look in the casket and what his funeral will be like, he told her she should prepare to die and get photos and make sure to have the outfit she wants to wear for the funeral. We also have a family plot which was purchased by grandfather , Uncle has the original deed. He constantly asks her "who is going to be buried there" (meaning me and my siblings). Not just once but every conversation she has with him. ..... These are conversations I have overheard and that she has told me, I'm sure he has said more abusive things. She just told me she's cleaning out her house to prepare for when she dies and is throwing her wedding dress away, something she told me she would keep forever! She also told me she's trying on outfits for her funeral burial.

She has minor health problems but nothing major at all, overall in good health, my uncle on the other hand is in failing health.

It's been so depressing and sad listening to all this and now I'm not sure what to do.

 

Senior Gems®

Senior Gems®: Helping Caregivers Assess and Provide Care for Seniors with Alzheimer’s and Dementia

The Senior Gems® created by Senior Helpers®, is a method used provide effective strategies for support and care for your loved one for everything from normal aging through late stage dementia. Through Senior Gems®, we are able to focus on what is precious and unique about each senior.

Changes take place as their disease progresses, but by taking a positive approach to care and using strategies that work, Senior Helpers can help your loved one to continue to live a purposeful life at home. The Senior Gems is based on the Gems™, techniques, strategies, and overall approach to care which was created and developed by Teepa Snow, Positive Approach, LLC.

The Gems classification system allows trained Senior Helpers caregivers to:

  • Identify the characteristics of different stages of dementia
  • Understand what a person can still do based on a gem level
  • Use specific strategies based on gem level to care for our seniors.
  • Create the best plan for caring for the individual long term.